We Need to Talk (Phoebe)

[Gin Takemoto]

Gin walked into Phoebe's new class. The main English teacher had ended up having a horrible accident. He had been hospitalized, but was going to pull through with some rehab. However, the man would not be able to return at all this school year. The new position had been thrust upon Phoebe, but from what Gin understood she still had time to duck out of the job. While he wanted to find out if she would be the new permanent teacher, that wasn't the only thing he needed to discuss with her.

Firstly, he needed to discuss what had happened during the fight against the other shadows. Him helping and how the others reacted to him were going to be the main parts of this conversation. The other thing he needed to talk to her about was something he was unsure about. He needed to discuss why she had spared him at all. Surely she knew that he could turn at any time, which made him question her reasoning. 

When he entered, he closed the door behind him. "Phoebe," he called out. "Are you able to talk?"

[Phoebe Minola]

Mr. Sheraton's accident had come out of the left field for everyone at the school, even more so for Phoebe. Normally, this is where she would've actually been shuffled into the position and do her actual job as a teacher. But the school still had a second English teacher and she would be sharing duties. She was quite glad about that because that meant she'd still keep her bookstore job and be able to do it. She and the other English teacher, Miss Bligh, had agreed that she would carry on with the younger classes and Phoebe would take the seniors. So far so good.

Of course, deciphering Mr. Sheraton's notes and planned curriculum, in that crappy, spidery handwriting of his was another deal.

She sat in the classroom, used only for the English courses, trying to make heads or tails of it. The classroom was empty now and gave her the privacy she needed. While trying to read and transcribe the notes, Phoebe was quietly grumbling; about the Full Moon battle, about the aftermath, about seeing some kids she knew to be students there, about a lot of things.

Why couldn't they get together and charge the perimeter to look for clues en masse and get this over with? And what the hell was it with the Sentient Shadows?

Suddenly the door was slid open; it always did so with a sharp crack due to a fault in the mechanism and catching her unprepared, it sounded like a gunshot. Phoebe uttered a small shriek and sat bolt upright in her chair.

More than the loud crack though, she'd been shocked by Gin's voice. She'd been dreading this interview for quite some time but knew how inevitable it was. Honestly, she'd wanted to start it. But being the massive coward that she was, she'd been putting it off time and time again.

Inside her, Hypatia tensed, like she didn't want him there.

"Well, I am now," she groaned and palmed her face. "Pull up a chair, Gin. This tete-a-tete has been long overdue."

How was she even going to start it? What should she ask? She thought of Alisa and the others and her promise to find out what Gin and the other Shadows wanted, what they really were and what they were doing in Mosaic City. She wasn't sure she could do something that important. She felt very cold, all of a sudden.

"So," she said, feeling her mouth dry. "You're a Shadow."

She stated the obvious as though she still couldn't quite believe it.

"While I'm thankful you turned up last full moon and helped out... Gin, I still don't understand. You came because you felt you owed me but... I don't understand anything about you," she said. "Gin, what are you, exactly?"

[Gin Takemoto]

Gin smiled. Phoebe had cut straight to the chase, calling out the obvious before questioning him. Sadly, he couldn't really answer her questions because he was unclear on the main details himself. He wasn't sure if he was something created by humans, from humans, or something separate entirely. His guess was the second option, but he had little way to verify this.

After all, he had little interaction with other shadows, let alone ones that would be able to clue him in. All he knew was that he had possessed a human boy's corpse and that he fed off of emotions. He doubted either of the answers would satisfy the woman, so he simply shrugged. He hoped she would ask him something he could answer soon.

[Phoebe Minola]

Seeing him shrug, Phoebe squinted at him. "Oh no, you're not getting out of this with just shrugs," she said. "You have to answer, even if you think that I won't like what you have to say."

She rested her elbow on the table and put her forehead in her palm. "Gin... I'm trying to understand what I've gotten myself into, here, alright? I can't speak for the other Users, but I'm a bit scared of this mess."

She studied him quietly. It occurred to her that he may not even understand his own condition. What if that was it? Should that be the case, she may never be able to find out what she needed. Still, she couldn't afford to really put the screws on him. If she spooked him off or made him angry... she'd lose this delicate balance they'd struck up. Heck, she might lose it anyway, who knew what went through Shadows' heads?

Alright, get back to basics.

"Gin, how old are you? Have you always been a Shadow?"

[Gin Takemoto]

Gin smiled. Finally, some questions I can answer! He debated for a moment before inding the exact way of how he wanted to word this. After all, there were only bad answers, but some might anger Phoebe less. "Well... I'll answer the second one first. I have always been a shadow. This body, though? It used to be a living, human boy." He paused, but continued with a sigh afterwards. "I'm not sure how old I am, exactly, but I know that Gin was thirteen when I took over his body. That was five years ago, so I guess I'm eighteen now."

He looked into the Greek's eyes for a moment before looking away. "Now you're going to ask how I took over the body, right? Well, I simply killed the boy. Then I merged with him, somehow."

[Phoebe Minola]

Phoebe's blood ran cold at Gin's answer. He'd... killed a boy. Just thirteen years old and then... taken over his body and his life. Somehow this shouldn't have surprised her. It coincided with everything they knew so far about Shadows; that they were aggressive and all they did when they met people was try to kill them. Was this why? Were they searching for a way to enter society under the guise of human beings? Why? What was the point of it? It was frustrating that, despite being seemingly honest answers, Gin's explanations raised more questions than they answered.

In the back of her mind, Hypatia shuddered and with her, so shuddered a part of her psyche that couldn't tolerate this mess. But on the other hand, she was determined to have some answers.

She couldn't do much else except stay calm and continue down the path she'd started on.

She was calm when she asked the next question. "...Why did you kill him? The boy, I mean."

[Gin Takemoto]

Gin felt the discomfort and anger that arose within Phoebe from his answer. He wasn't surprised at this, but it saddened him. He doubted that the woman would continue the uneasy alliance if she thought he was dangerous, and he wasn't sure just how well he would be able to resist killing her if she were to attack. She may have become stronger during their fight and afterwards, but Gin had been as well. He knew that she wouldn't be able to stand for long against him.

He regarded her question. Why had he killed the child? He couldn't remember his past reasonings, as his memories were eventually blotted out as Gin's took over. With a sad shake of the head, the shadow looked down so as to sho that he couldn't answer.

[Phoebe Minola]

Again with the silence and the shaking of the head. Phoebe was getting frustrated. Maybe he really didn't know, but just giving her silence was not enough. She had to have answers but moreover she had to try and understand just what the sentient Shadows were about. How different from humans were they, in their human guises? What did it even mean that they could become human-like?

"Gin, I can't understand unless you explain your thoughts to me," she said quietly, almost kindly. "Even if you don't know the answer, I still need to hear what your thoughts on the whole thing are. Unless I understand then I can't keep trusting you."

She sighed again and rested her elbows on the desk. "What do you remember before you confronted the boy? What brought you to Mosaic? Are you connected to other sentient Shadows in the city at all?"

[Gin Takemoto]

Gin looked at the teacher. He remembered very little of his time as a separate entity from Gin. In fact, his earliest memories as a shadow were of him merging with Gin. He smiled sadly before responding, saying, "I have no idea why I killed him. My memories are from the boy, which has only caused problems. One of such is that I know nothing of myself anymore." He then went to answer the other questions. "The reason I came here was surprisingly human. I was sent to live with Gin's aunt, whom I have yet to meet. As for connected with other shadows, I only know one. The snake-lady who helped during the full moon? Sakuya, I think her name was. I had only met her recently, but that's the best I can provide for you, Phoebe."

[Phoebe Minola]

Truly, that was probably the best he could've told her. It stuck with some theories she already had concerning Shadows and Personas. The two things were connected, but she wasn't completely sure how. It could be the Jungian thing, it could be something else entirely. Again, more questions were raised than answered. She did take note of the fact that Gin mentioned Sakuya. That woman bore looking into but she didn't think she was the right person for that. After all, Jaelyn was involved with her and that was complication enough.

"You mean... the family has no idea that you..." she left it hanging.

That was a horrible thought. To find out that the boy they knew and loved was essentially dead and replaced by...something. But was it really that different? And exactly what did that make Gin, now? Was he a Shadow in a boy's shell or had the boy just developed Shadow-like powers? Gin was Gin now and there may be nothing left of the boy.

"Do you think you're very different from who the boy was? After all, your human form is perfect. You eat and drink and sleep normally, right? You only assume your Shadow form when you feel like it - how does that work, anyway?"

[Gin Takemoto]

Gin listened to how Phoebe responded. He could tell she was enduring inner turmoil over his answers, and he could tell without delving into her emotions. It was plainly etched onto her face. He considered trying to comfort her, but he dismissed the idea since it would most likely only cause more harm. He stood back and formulated a response.

He finally spoke, saying, "I may not be exactly like he was, but that is for multiple reasons. For one, I've experienced growth that he had yet to. However, I am essentially the same person, if with an alter ego. I assimilated into his life with little difficulty, as I had his memories. As for changing 'form,' as you say, I imagine that it is similar to how you summon your Persona. It is simply second nature."

[Phoebe Minola]

So the Shadow retained the boy's memories. Very interesting. She mentally noted all of this, making up her mind that she really needed to get in contact with Alisa and discuss these new findings. She studied his looks carefully. It really was impossible to tell that he wasn't human per se. That was a bit... alarming, actually. She doubted whether they had any way to reliably tell apart who was a human, a Shadow or even a User. She had started being able to sense a few Shadows whenever she was in the outskirts, like be able to tell which Shadows were stronger than others and where they more or less were before she saw them, but not by much.

"So, you could change any time you wanted? Could you change right now?" she asked. "Also... you actually eat, right? I've never seen Shadows eat, so... do you have any idea what they do for sustenance? How does that work with you?"

[Gin Takemoto]

Gin started to shake his head. 'It doesn't work that way," he said. "I only do it when I'm in the Shadowlands. As for feeding... Well, do you remember our first conversation?" Gin was referring to when Phoebe first started to work as the substitute English teacher in his class. After class, Gin had stopped her and spoke to her for a little while and then the conversation turned to cuisine. 

"Allow me to put it this way," he said. "Shadows feed off of emotions. Each of us prefer a different one, as far as I know. I enjoy feeding off of entertainment. Others may feed off of sorrow, hate, greed, lust, or even disappointment. Also, due to this, we are able to feel the emotions of humans. Sense them, as it were."

[Phoebe Minola]

"I see, so you can only change forms when you're in the Shadows' natural habitat. But during the battle of the full moon you were there in your Shadow form," she observed. "Was it because the sky had changed and the Shadows had popped up? Does that alter the state of the city so much that Shadows feel welcome to it?"

She listened to him explain how Shadows fed. So, they fed on emotions. And they even had preferences. It was very interesting but at the same time alarming. If they 'fed' on emotions, what did that mean for people who were being preyed upon? Did it have any effect on them?

"Gin, this feeding, does it do anything to people?" she asked. "And, if you sense emotions, can you sense Users too? You looked so shocked when you saw me having a Persona back when we first fought."

[Gin Takemoto]

Gin was about to answer when he heard the school bell ring. He looked at Phoebe with a wry grin. "Classes are starting," he said. He needed to get to his class. "As for your questions, it does alter the city. But it doesn't make us feel more welcome, it just singles out the tastiest snacks. That would be those who don't transmogrify." 

He gathered up his items to head to class. "And no, I can't sense Users. That's not an emotion, you know. The only other beings I can sense are shadows." Walking out of the door, Gin turned to face the sub. "I'll see you later, Miss Minola."