The Stand - (Wo)Man or Machine (Alisa/Ultimate)

[Pyxis]

Pyxis's mind had started to wander more and more as she made her way back. She had been prone to that ever since the recent full moon. No...since before that, even. Since her conversation with Crux on the beach. His words, as much as they irritated her, had managed to linger in her thoughts. What she was doing, according to him, was deviating from the mission. Humans were fragile, and better off disregarded. They were given the means to think, to feel, to have human-like experiences, but only as far as the mind extended. Their bodies were still made of metal, and living alongside humanity in such a state was impossible. Pyxis had objections to every single one of those statements, but she couldn't deny that there was some truth to them. As far as her duty and reason for existing were concerned, humans were only a distraction. But they were still a necessity. It was because of humans that she had gotten so far.

Wasn't it?

By now, she'd made her way back out into the Great Halls. She checked her radar the moment she stepped out of the library, ensuring that no shadows were around to impede her progress. None, and very few within the radar's maximum range, either. She mimed a sigh of relief as she continued her slow walk towards the exit. As she went, she noted that the halls had gone quiet ever since the library had been opened up. With no imminent threat of shadow attacks, the vast halls seemed even larger and emptier than ever. It was an uncomfortably fitting backdrop for her current situation. All the better to get out quickly, but Pyxis didn't have the will or energy for speed at the moment. So instead, she took a seat on top of a pile of debris and decided to wait it out. Was it irrational? Absolutely. But she'd become accustomed to quite a few irrational behaviors lately. What was one more?

After awhile, she started to feel something unsettling take hold over her. She couldn't quite put a name to what it was, save perhaps for what humans would call a 'bad feeling'. Hardly a new experience, but one she still didn't have logical terms for. It was similar to the sensation she felt when strong shadows were near: a nagging sensation of urgency in the corner of her consciousness with nothing concrete to attach it to. But with shadows, her sensory systems provided something concrete: detection of shadows nearby and a notification alarm if they were close enough. This had nothing like that with it, leaving it hanging on its own to bother Pyxis without providing a reason why. She closed her eyes and tried to shut the feeling out, but it refused to go away. A machine was simple. Even an intricate one like herself was just made of many simple parts, and one of them could be temporarily disabled if need be. Rudimentary artificial intelligence was the same: an individual 'thought' routine could be disabled or removed entirely. The human mind was something entirely different. As a whole, it could be disabled by forcing its owner to lose consciousness, but individual parts, individual thoughts, would continue running no matter what effort was put into shutting them down. In that way, Pyxis's was much more like a human's than a machine's now. No...save for the fact that she was still consciously aware of being mechanical in nature, and the limitations that came with that, her mind was now almost entirely human in nature. The body of a combat unit, the mind of a human...it was a cruel paradox. Especially where one particular human was concerned.

Life signs detected.

The familiar alert jostled Pyxis out of her inner monologue. Life signs? Here? ...No, she knew by now that that was hardly an unusual occurrence out here. There were plenty of strong Users who used this castle as a training ground now. Nothing strange about it. And yet, something about the situation seemed oddly familiar. Even so, the 'bad feeling' she'd been getting caused her to react to the notification more tensely than usual. "Who's there?" she asked.

[Ayakura Alisa]

Another day, another moment wasted as I fruitlessly wandered these damnable halls. I was getting tired of it all. Progress was becoming something on the level of mythical at this rate. On top of that, my body felt significantly weaker after being exposed to high levels of bannou-class energy, and I seriously wondered if I had made a poor life decision making my way here. Sighing, I made my way to a nearby pillar and leaned against it, giving myself a rest. Looking around, I saw a pile of debris where a familiar figure sat, looking evidently distraught about something. Incidentally, it turned out to be Pyxis. As unsettled as she looked, I could only imagine what she must be thinking about her own situation. She was literally skirting the border between man and machine. Well, woman, in this particular case.

In my inner monologue I heard Pyxis call out "Who's there?" since she hadn't seen me, but obviously knew someone was there. It was really just like when I first met her. She detected me easily, but didn't know it was me.

"No worries, Pyxis, it's just me. Weary and tired from another trip into the library." I called out to Pyxis as I waved from my position, leaning against the pillow. "Anything I can do for you? You don't look so hot right now."

[Pyxis]

Pyxis's eyes were drawn towards a nearby pillar as she got her answer. Standing there...or rather, leaning against the pillar, was none other than Alisa. It was a strange coincidence, that she showed up almost immediately after Pyxis's thoughts started turning to her. Or perhaps, not a coincidence at all. Pyxis couldn't say.

"You too, huh?" Pyxis said. Alisa looked as exhausted as she felt. Seeing it was strange. Both of them were beyond the level where even the shadows of this area should have caused them trouble. And yet, here they were. Pyxis briefly wondered if Alisa had also run into an inordinately strong shadow. Or a horde. Or both. But then Alisa turned the subject of conversation back toward Pyxis, noting her own less than perfect condition. "Stay here and indulge me for a bit, I guess," Pyxis said. "There's no shadows nearby, so it'll be fine."

She mimed taking a deep breath, but really she was just trying to sort her current thoughts into words. There was way too much to say. About what Crux had said, about what Alisa had said back when they met at her apartment, about her feelings, about the depressing reality that the strongest of their enemies kept getting stronger, while most of the riffraff she fought through to get stronger herself never changed. And many more things that tied into all of that. Finally, though, she thought of a decent starting place. The event that ultimately triggered this cascade of troubling, distracting thoughts.

"I ran into one of my siblings a couple weeks ago. Not while fighting, mind you, I just found him standing out on the beach one night and felt like talking to him. That...was a mistake." Pyxis turned her eyes downward. "You've seen him before, I'm sure. He's the boy with bandages sticking out from all under his clothes. He ended up saying a lot of things that bothered me, like how associating with humans was deviating from our mission and they were better off ignored. And it got me to thinking about something you said once. I may finally have an answer for you. I think...I think I'd rather be human myself."

[Ayakura Alisa]

Pyxis called for me to stay here and stay with her for a while. Well, I certainly wasn't going to decline. I sunk in my position and ended up sitting on the ground, still leaning against the pillar. Idly bracing myself I looked intently at Pyxis, about to listen to whatever she had to say. Soon, she explained how she met another one of the ASWs, siblings, as she called them. The young boy with bandages sticking out? Yeah, I'd seen him before, and he didn't seem like the kind of person who would work together very well with humans. Associating with humans, deviating from the mission? That made no sense given the nature of Shadows (though come to think of it, he may have come to the conclusion that because of their nature, it would be a plan to eliminate humans instead), but I didn't really want to say anything. She then moved on to recall upon that question I posed upon her way back when I visited her at her apartment.

"I see..." I stood up and coughed, but still, I made my way closer to Pyxis. Apparently, the last full moon battle still did a number on me. I was dangerously close to passing out there, and it was affecting me on some levels. "Yes. It would be nice... But, you are you, and I do like you and appreciate you for who you are. No matter what happens, I'll be there for you." I moved in to give Pyxis a hug.

[Pyxis]

As Alisa made her way closer, Pyxis noted that she was in a much worse state than she'd originally thought. Alisa was coughing, and walking seemed to be difficult for her. That wasn't good. Pyxis recognized that she may end up having to carry Alisa out. She was ready for that, if it came to it. But...that only made her thoughts more confusing. Her energy and endurance were always one of the biggest pros about being a machine. Alisa's current state was a prime example of that. No matter how beaten up she'd gotten, or how badly drained she was, Pyxis had never failed to get back to her apartment after a journey into the shadowlands.

But sometimes, that was only a narrow difference.

Alisa answered that it would be nice, if Pyxis was a human, but that she still liked her for who she was. That...provided some comfort, at least, but her feelings for Alisa were only one of the larger parts of a greater picture. "I'm glad to hear it, but...it's more than that. It's strange...I didn't think I'd be bothered so much by the paradox of a human mind and mechanical body. But here I am. It would be so much easier to just be one or the other." She accepted Alisa's hug, gently putting her arms around her. "Sorry, I'm probably not making much sense at the moment. It's hard to put all of this into words."

The 'bad feeling' she had felt had faded a little bit when she saw Alisa, but now it was back, pulling at her consciousness with all the urgency of a proximity warning, but none of the reason. Then a reason came, in the form of faint but alarmingly close footsteps. Pyxis instinctively pulled away from Alisa and looked towards the source. There, she saw a woman who looked just like her, with a few notable exceptions. Instead of her usual maid uniform, the woman wore a deep blue cocktail dress. It seemed ridiculous, to wear such a thing, but Pyxis soon realized that was a reason for it. It left the shoulders exposed, and was just thin enough to show the shape of her hips underneath. Neither had exposed mechanical joints, like Pyxis had, but rather were naturally covered by flesh and skin. Her hands and feet were fully fleshed and uncovered as well. In fact, it was safe to say that not-Pyxis looked completely human.

Well, except for the eyes. The glowing yellow eyes weren't normal to any human. In fact, if not for the fact that her sensors hadn't detected the woman at all, Pyxis would have instantly been certain that she was a shadow. "Oh? This is unusual. I expected you to attack on instinct. But I guess this is just a sign of how human your mind's become."

Pyxis focused her mind, attempting to summon her Persona, but it wouldn't come. Not good. She raised one arm instead, pointing her fingers towards the doppelganger. She laughed in response, spreading her arms wide. "By all means, prove me wrong and shoot me now if it'll make you feel better. But we both know you won't. After all...I am you."

[Ayakura Alisa]

Pyxis pulled away from me almost instinctively, and I'd have asked about it until I realized that off to the side was, in fact, a woman who looked very similar to Pyxis, aside from those ever-familiar glowing yellow eyes and the fact she was dressed much like how a social butterfly at a dinner party would dress like. The key thing was how she looked clearly human despite most likely being a shadow. Pyxis' shadow, of all the things. Dangerously exposed to the conflicts within herself that most likely propped up within the past month or so, it left her vulnerable to this psychological offensive. I can't claim to know about her struggle, but I have to stay by her. I'm not willing to lose another person I deeply care for. Not again.

"Be careful on how you address this. You were there when I faced the same kind of phenomena. Now it's my turn to stand with you. Remember what you told me that day." I simply said calmly to Pyxis as she raised an arm towards her other self. It was clear that she couldn't summon her Persona this time around. Accepting reality was one thing, but dealing with it and moving past it was what really mattered. Indeed, this Shadow could be representative of the paradox that had been plaguing Pyxis for the past while now. The body of a machine, the mind of a human. Where then, did the heart lie? A metalheart, or a soul? It must be agonizing for the mind to deal with.

"No matter what you decide to do, I'll help you the best as I can."

[Pyxis]

Pyxis glanced back at Alisa. Alisa's response to the shadow's appearance harkened back to what had happened in the library a month before, back when her own shadow had appeared.  Pyxis nodded, then turned back to the shadow.  For a second, she could have sworn the shadow had given Alisa a warm smile, but she paid it no mind.  "You look human," she said.

The shadow smiled and gave an affirmative nod.  "Of course," she said.  "I am what you really want, and what you really want is to be human.  So that is what I am."  She twirled in place, showing herself off.  "Look!  No exposed joints!  No weapons bolted to my frame!  No frame to bolt weapons to, even!  Just flesh, blood, and bone, like any other human.  Isn't this what you've dreamed of?"  She stopped once she was facing the two of them again, then turned to Alisa.  "Did you know that Anti-Shadow Weapons could dream?  Not all of them, of course, but Pyxis here can.  She dreams of being human.  And of you, occasionally, but mostly of being human."

"That's-" Pyxis started.  The shadow laughed.

"Oh, that's right, you haven't confessed your feelings yet, have you?" she asked in a teasing tone.  "Not completely, at least.  Well, don't worry too much about that.  As you are now, I'm sure it wouldn't make much difference either way"

"What are you talking about?" Pyxis asked.

"She'll never return your love.  Not with that mechanical body of yours," the shadow answered, completely uncaring to the fact that Alisa was still there to hear every word.  Pyxis instinctively looked in Alisa's direction, in anticipation of a reaction, but quickly averted her eyes.  Maybe it was better not to know just yet.  "Aww, you're blushing.  Or you would be, if you could," the shadow continued.  Pyxis noticed a trace of red over the shadow's cheeks as she spoke.  Was she...doing it for her?  Or just taunting her?  "I could change that, though.  I could make you human.  Look at me, Pyxis.  Look at my body.  Don't you want it for yourself?"

Pyxis did look, but only for a few more seconds before she bowed her head and closed her eyes.  "That's...a cruel temptation," she finally said.

[Ayakura Alisa]

The Shadow looked at me briefly as she talked about how she was so totally human, and told me that ASWs could dream, and that Pyxis dreamt of being human. Even telling me she had dreams of me, occasionally, but that would be something I'd talk about another time. I trembled as the Shadow began to taunt Pyxis, noting how the ASW had never made it explicit that she had feelings for me, even if I had been, at the very least, suspecting of it. The Shadow even had the audacity to speak on my behalf, saying things that simply were just not true. I turned to face Pyxis as she bowed her head, closing her eyes, and seemed to struggle even more.

I shook more, I couldn't tell if it was from the weakness of my body, or if it was from the surge of emotions, but I took Pyxis' hand and held it somewhat tightly. "Keep it together, Pyxis dear. You have to focus. We can talk about that thing later. What matters now is that you overcome what's before you. You can do it. I believe in you. I told you. No matter how you are, machine or human, I'll always care for you."

[Pyxis]

A small smile came to Pyxis's face as she heard Alisa's words and felt her hand in her own.  So...there was still some hope, then.  Possibly.  But she was right.  For now, dealing with the enemy in front of them was more important than sorting out either of their feelings.  That could wait.  And it had to be an enemy, to tempt her in such a way.  Even if temptation was a very human weakness, Pyxis was no stranger to it.  Such was the state of her mind.  But Alisa's words made it easier to resist.

The shadow seemed to recognize this, and spoke again before Pyxis could.  "Interesting.  Perhaps I was wrong.  Or perhaps she's simply saying that out of fear.  Either one is possible.  But it doesn't matter either way.  Even if she does love you as you are, it's impossible to be together with her.  You're a slave to your duty.  You know this.  Crux reminded you of this, and you lashed out at him."

"I lashed out at him because he advocated killing everyone inside the city," Pyxis countered, although she knew that had only been the final straw.  She had wanted to punch him from the moment he said that falling in love went against her mission.

The shadow, of course, immediately called her on it.  "Only because that was the only thing you confidently claim he was wrong about.  Until he said that, you would have just bottled it up and walked away, because you knew he was right.  You can't live like a human.  The moment this crisis is resolved, if it is ever resolved, you will be called to return and sent out on a new assignment.  If you object, they will force it on you, one way or another.  Even if it means erasing part or all of your memories.  You've created your illusions of freedom, but in the end they will all be broken down and you'll go right back to being a weapon.  'Take the sword in hand?'  Hah.  Those were pretty words, but we both know you wish you could let it go whenever you wanted.  But that sword is a part of you, and the only way to get rid of it is through me.  Otherwise you will always and forever be a slave to your mission to destroy shadows!"

Pyxis's eyes remained closed as the shadow spoke.  All harsh words, but words she could no more deny than anything that Crux had said.  She knew it was true.  She'd mentioned it before, to Alisa back in her apartment.  It still held true.  That was the other reason why she wished to be human.  The one she hadn't been able to express to Alisa just before her shadow showed up.  And now, that was out in the open too.  But if she was to be a slave to that mission, then she was obligated to fulfill it.  There was a shadow right in front of her.

"Then I will carry out that mission," Pyxis said.  Her voice had gone rigid and emotionless.  She opened her eyes, and rather than being green and human-like they were now a solid red with no pupils.  "Extraneous routines disabled until the target has been eliminated and returned to the source.  Engaging."

A hailstorm of bullets erupted from her finger guns, shredding through the shadow's body.  The shadow staggered back from the gunfire, bleeding black ichor from the many wounds she had just sustained.  But even as Pyxis continued firing, the shadow started to recover.  Her body healed.  Her dress dissolved away, leaving nothing left in the way of clothing.  Glowing etchings that were recognizable as those donning the iconic box that Pyxis's Persona once held, and now rose out of, appeared on the shadow's bare skin like tattoos.  Her eyes turned a solid red as well.  And finally, a pair of white wings emerged from her back and folded around her, blocking several more bullets before Pyxis stopped firing.

"You're a fool, Pyxis," the shadow said.  "It was my desire to help you.  To free you from your duty.  But if you wish to turn on me instead, then I'll see to it that every last trace of your machine self is destroyed."

---

Shadow Pyxis - Reverse Pandora
Absorb: N/A  Repel: Strike  Null: Elec  Resist: Slash, Pierce  Weak: None
[Cloudgatherer's Will] - Major Elec damage + Fear status to all
[Misfortunes of Humanity] - Severe Dark damage to one
[Spirit of Expectancy] - Severe Light damage to one
[Pandora's Box] - Moderate Almighty damage + random status to all

[Ayakura Alisa]

I knew very well that at the mission's conclusion it was most likely that Pyxis would have to leave. We were even joking about it at one point. I was just as aware of it as Pyxis was. I looked at her and she turned serious. I stepped back to give her some room before I sighed, clutching at my chest wondering why I was starting to feel pains. Regardless, amidst minor coughing, I stood my ground and prepared myself to assist Pyxis if it was necessary. Eventually, Pyxis began to open fire on the Shadow, but despite the hail of bullets, the Shadow didn't seem to really get hurt. Eventually, she changed. She grew a pair of wings and used them to deflect the bullet fire. Taunting her. And that was that.

"I've got your back, Pyxis." I said softly as Vasuki emerged behind me once more, arms outstretched and my own as well, as we began to charge balls of light energy. At the pivotal point, when the balls were quite large, we aimed them at the winged Shadow, and let the lasers fly, all 8 of them, all pointed at the Shadow in an attempt to open with some damage.

[Pyxis]

[Battle Theme]

Beside Pyxis, Alisa expressed intent to assist her and fired on the shadow with a volley of beams of light.  Pyxis's systems marked Alisa as an ally.  She would render assistance and provide support where possible, so long as it didn't interfere with the goal of eliminating the shadow in front of her.  It also meant that she would receive the benefit of Pyxis's offensive and defensive buffs.  A presence made itself known in her head, although even with her limited consciousness she could tell it didn't feel quite the same as before.  Persona summoning routines activated, creating the image of a girl in white, rising out of a cylindrical box.  But the light that usually adorned her form was gone, leaving only hair and a dress of pale translucent white.

The meteors summoned by the Persona were quite real, though, and came crashing down on the not-quite-angelic-looking shadow.  Rather than dealing the damage Pyxis was used to, though, the bounced right off her wings and were sent hurtling right back at her.  She absorbed the shock of the attack with no damage.  But the advantage had been lost.  And the shadow made it known by going right into a counterattack.

A cylindrical box appeared in front of her, missing its lid.  Darkness spewed out of the top, taking skeletal forms as it flowed across the hall and converged on Pyxis.  Her systems registered damage from dark energy bombarding her from all sides, but otherwise Pyxis didn't react at all.

"So cold," the shadow said.  "Maybe this will get you to react?"  A mirror image of Pyxis's persona emerged from the box next, shining its normal white light.  Pyxis looked towards it, but again displayed no reaction, save for a single word.

"Elpis."

Even so, the shadow continued talking.  "You thought of her as a spirit of hope, didn't you?  But that's not actually true.  Elpis is Expectation.  She's the blind belief that no matter how bad things get, there's always a light at the end of the tunnel.  She's something to be clung to, rather than rallied under.  Even when that light turns out to be an oncoming train."  The shadow's version of Elpis created a mass of white light in her hands, then sent it in a single beam at Alisa.

"Maybe it was right for her to stay trapped in Pandora's Box."

[Ayakura Alisa]

I looked at Pyxis, she was silent, almost entirely different from the Pyxis I once knew. What happened to her? Even as she was taking damage from the dark spell of the Shadow, she didn't react, save for one word, was it a name? It probably was the name of her Persona, judging from the Shadow's reaction. I eyeballed the Shadow as soon something came out of the box and used my own technique against me, shooting a single white beam of light energy right at me. Being unprepared for the attack for the most part, and my body still weak from my last major battle, I was sent hurtling into a nearby pillar where my back slammed into it and hurt.

Standing up weakly, I grumbled and trembled, though at this rate I don't know how much more punishment I could take. Coughing, I glared at the Shadow and let my arms glow green, and I hurled my arms forward, causing blades of sharp winds to slice forward at the Shadow as I attempted to try out my wind spell. I wasn't in the mood nor in the condition to try for another light cannon assault. "Ugh... What happened to you?"

[Pyxis]

Words reached Pyxis's auditory sensors, but she didn't register or react to them. She simply continued her assault.  Pattern recognition kicked in, and she moved away from physical skills.  Instead, the faded form of her Persona gathered white fire in its hands, and launched a large ball of it at the shadow.  It reacted more adversely than her previous attacks, too it, although not as badly as to what Alisa was throwing around.  Her magic-based abilities were far inferior to her physical ones, after all.  But with the shadow resisting or reflecting her physical attacks, there was little choice.  Tactically, it was a poor but necessary course of action.  Even her most effective attacks were too weak to deal significant damage.  She was at a disadvantage here.

Meanwhile, the shadow chose to answer Alisa's question in Pyxis's stead.  "Can't you tell?  She's shut off her personality to avoid troubling thoughts.  It's a shame.  I had hoped to win her over, but like this the only choice I have is to destroy her."

Electricity crackled around the shadow's wings.  She seemed to charge up for a few seconds, before spreading them wide and sending a rain of lightning bolts down on the two of them.  Those that hit Pyxis wrapped around her maid uniform, getting weaker and weaker until they faded entirely.  "Tch.  Without that armor, she would be done already," the shadow said.  "Just another weakness of her machine body.  But she's covered it up."

[Ayakura Alisa]

The Shadow spoke for her, it seemed. It should have been obvious. Pyxis did mention turning off "extraneous routines." Was personality one of them? That didn't seem right to me, but it made sense. But if she wanted to get over this hurdle, she'd have to see that personality is what gives us the drive and motivation to get shit done. What did I have to do to get her to see that? Soon enough, the Shadow used her wings to create electrical energy and then shooting a rain of lightning bolts on the both of us. Pyxis' armor seemed to protect her from the lightning, but I didn't fare very well. I was sent to my knees as I took the spell, not as well as I was used to.

Standing up and shaking from the shock from the electricity, I groaned. "Come on, keep yourself together!" I heaved out towards Pyxis as I wobbled and let flames wrap around my own arms and I hurled my arm forward at the Shadow in order to blast her with some fire of my own. It turns out that the Shadow was more susceptible to magical attacks, though not necessarily weak to them. She just resisted physical attacks, so my knife wouldn't do me too good here.

[Pyxis]

Again, the words didn't register with Pyxis.  They weren't discussing strategy, or giving orders.  They were unimportant.  Extraneous.  Discarded.  She filtered them out, and just kept on attacking the shadow.  More white flames appeared on Elpis's hands, coating them and providing the only light the usually brilliant Persona gave off.  But even the fire wasn't as bright as it usually was.  In fact, for a second, it almost seemed like it was starting to die out.  It hardly compared to its usual strength, and paled next to the fire Alisa produced.  But then the Persona launched it at the shadow, and it dealt damage all the same.

"You're not getting through to her, you know," Shadow Pyxis said, turning to Alisa.  She brushed off the flames from both attacks, although it was apparent that she was starting to take significant damage from them.  "I'm the only one who's still listening.  But in your current state I'm afraid I may accidentally end up killing you too in the process of destroying her."  The cylindrical box appeared again in front of the shadow, still missing its lid.  "Did you hear that, other me?  Your precious Alisa is going to die here!  Does that not bother you?"

Pyxis's only response was a faint twitching motion.  It was only visible in the eyes and one hand, but it was definitely a reaction.  The shadow grinned on seeing it, but that didn't stop her attack.  A wave of pure energy spilled out of Pandora's Box, raining down on the battlefield to deal non-elemental damage.  It wasn't particularly strong, but Pyxis could fell something more sinister than raw offensive ability sink in.  It was as though her energy reserves had sprung a leak, and what little she had left was starting to spill out even when she was idle.

"Elpis.  Come back out," Shadow Pyxis continued.  Again, the proper, fully illuminated spirit of hope expectation appeared out of the box.  Another mass of light gathered in its hands, then erupted into a concentrated beam, aimed straight at Alisa.  Pyxis's body moved on instinct.  The same instinct that drove her to fight, and to attempt to bring down the shadow in front of her, just drove her to throw herself in the way of the beam of light.

She looked back at Alisa.  Her eyes were still a solid red, but her face had gone from completely blank to softened in concern.  Her voice was still rigid and robotic, but she spoke nonetheless.  "Are you alright?"

---

[Inflicted with Exhaustion]